You Don’t Know What Love Is, You Just Do As You’re Told

Yes, the title of this post is from a White Stripes song.  Many of us have been told through media over the years that we will find that one person who will complete us.  All those Disney movies where the prince finally meets his princess or vice versa.  I think that God has set aside one person for everyone.  However it’s not going to just magically happen over night.  We won’t just magically find them one day and have all our desires met without having to do anything.  That’s how problems start.  If you spend your whole time searching aimlessly then you may miss out on what God has planned for you.  Rather than trying to find the person who can complete you, try being the person that the on you’re looking for is looking for.  How do you do that? you ask.

Let’s take a look at 1 Corinthians 13:4-8.  Yes it’s really that obvious for those of you who know what I’m talking about.

 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
 8 Love never fails.


If you practice these kinds of things, you will become more attractive to the person who you are looking for.  It will also help you during marriage.   But what does it all mean?

Patience  Give love as much time as it needs to develop and no less.  Guys, don’t force yourselves on women!  Ladies, don’t make him kiss you if he doesn’t want to yet.  Real love should never be uncomfortable for either person involved.  Don’t rush things.

Kindness  Put the other person first, be thinking about how they feel all the time with the decisions you make.

Love Is Not Self Seeking Put the needs of your significant other first, you take care of her, she’ll take care of you.  Don’t go into a relationship just for what you can get out of it, but more so for what you can give to it.
Love Does Not Envy  If the other person is feeling good about themselves and you’re not, don’t drag them down to your level, try to be happy for them and perhaps some of their happiness will rub off on you and you’ll be happier just from being around them.

Love Does Not Boast  If you’re out to dinner with someone you like and they tell an awesome story…don’t try and top it.  Love is not about one-up-man-ship, rather, tell a different kind of story and let them bask in their own accomplishment.

Love Is Not Proud  instead of bragging about yourself all the time, try to lift your significant other up. 

Love Does Not Delight In Evil This is actually pretty simple…or so it would seem.  Don’t do nasty sorts of things to your significant other.  Don’t cheat on them with someone else or watch nasty videos on the internet or do anything that would make them feel uncomfortable or angry with you.  This one kind of loops back to the kindness topic.

Love Protects  Protect your significant other from harm and temptation.

Love Hopes  Don’t drag your significant other down when he or she has dreams and aspirations.

Love Trusts  Trusting your significant other to be there for you as also key in order for any relationship to work.

Love Perseveres Many people think that when they get married they will no longer experience any troubles in life.  That is a fatal mistake to make.  Troubles will come in relationships.  The people who don’t think that will happen will come across them and go crazy and then their relationship will disolve.  If a couple practices perseverance then they can come up against anything and be strong enough to get through it, and be even stronger afterward perhaps.  Don’t just ditch your significant other when problems arise.  Work through them together.

Love Never Fails  So many people would say the opposite what with the way the divorce rates are these days.  However, the Hollywood portayal of love is not accurate.  Real love is more than chemestry, finishing each other’s sentances and wild sex, .  Yeah that’s right.  and you’re thinking WHAT?  Sure you can have that along with real love, but it can’t be the basis of your relationship or else it will fail because you are self seeking and not putting each other first.  That is what causes love to fail, when it is not real.  If you have real love and continue to practice it day by day, concentrating on the virtues discussed above, then you will NOT FAIL!  How cool is that?!!!

Real love can still be found in society today if people are willing to work at it.

Further Reading: Check out my friend’s blog post “Love Wins”

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