Deja Vu: “Would You Like To Say Hello To My Dog?”

The first time was at a look off on the side of a road.

Lady:  “Would you like to say hello to a dog?”

Me in my head:  “Is it going to talk back?”  …And now it’s time to carry on with the rest of my life.


Earlier this week I’m walking the two blocks downhill to work by myself as always.  Don’t worry, it’s uphill on the way back.  We must be fair.  Not bothering anyone.   Not wanting to bother anyone.  I’m walking past the elementary school and this young adult man, I’m terrible at guessing the ages of people these days,  is playing with his dog in the field out front of the school.  He has a stupidly long beard and is wearing shorts.  It’s February.  The coldest part of the year.  This man has at least one screw loose.

I continue walking.  As I approach the corner.  I realize he has come over to me to ask the question.

Him:  “Would you like to say hello to my dog?”

Me:  *Noticing that the dog is trying to go in the other direction*  “I don’t think it wants to.  It seems to want to go over there.”

Him: “Please pet him!  He needs love!”

Me in my head:  “Why aren’t you giving him love, then?   Aren’t you supposed to be his best friend?  What do you need me for?  We don’t even know each other.  Why aren’t you at work?  Why are you wearing shorts?”

He keeps badgering me about it til I give in.  Realizing this is the only way I’ll make it to work on time, I reluctantly pet the dog who didn’t want me to pet him in the first place to appease his strange owner.  I feel like this is how people get involved in dog #METOO incidents.  I don’t want to be involved in any sort of #METOO incident for that matter.

“Have a good one!”  He says.

“You too…” I reply.

I walk off, smelling like garbage for the rest of the day, after having just recently showered and everything.  Why are dog owners not enough for their dogs?  Why do they have to beg strangers in the street to pet their dogs?  If someone did that to another human, he or she would be in trouble so fast.  I will never understand this.

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