The Apartment Drama: Don’t Move The Lamp

Apartment Drama

There’s no shortage of material for this section this month.

Yesterday evening, I was sitting on the couch reading the second volume of Philip Jose Farmer’s series The World of Tiers.  (The whole series is good, you should read it too.)  I had my Christmas lights on, and a lamp was on the end table next to me.  It was all quite nice.  At one point I decided to move the lamp a little bit closer to me in order to get more light and continue to enjoy reading.  Eventually, I stop reading and turn off all the lights and head to my room.  There’s no sense in having any of them on if I’m not going to be out there.

I start to watch a movie on Netflix when suddenly Gene bursts into the apartment, returning from one of his frequent escapades.

He fumbles around trying to get the closet door open so he can remove his heavy overcoat and whatever else.  Suddenly, Gene cries out, in what seems like a loud voice, “Bri?!”

There he goes again with the Bri thing…..

“What happened here?!”  Gene inquired shoutingly….or so it seemed.

What could possibly be the problem here? I wonder, did Gene find yet another mysterious fingernail fragment.  Did he break another dish?  I should probably check this out.

I wander out to the living room as I have a thousand times before.  “What’s the problem, Gene?”

“This lamp got moved a bit.” Gene replied.

“I’m sorry, I moved it so I could see better to read.”

“Oh!  no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. That’s cool!  I thought something had fallen over!” Gene exclaimed profusely.

I knew something was still eating him though.  Nobody uses that many negatives before a positive in a sentence when stuff is completely alright.  I had made sure that none of his photos of his grown daughters, or Christmas cards from old lady friends had fallen over

In short Gene pulled a Monica (from Friends)…and I felt like Chandler in this scene.

This is not to say that Gene and Monica are completely the same. The fact that Gene’s books are strewn haphazardly about the living room because of his “poor study and organizational habits” (which he makes no effort to improve) proves this.  However, if you move one of his lamps.  He will notice, and he will be bewildered.

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